I lost my temper today. Not at Mom, but at her hairdresser, the one who has been cutting her hair for about 20 years. When I called last week to make an appointment, Hairdresser X—we’ll call him Ralph—was hesitant to make an appointment for us. He’s seen Mom become more frail and unpredictable due to Alzheimer’s, so I could understand his hesitation. I assured Ralph I’d be there, too, reminding him that Mom dotes on him and enjoys being in his salon. We showed up early for th

We are standing in the middle of the mall and we have a half hour to spend before my father picks us up. Mom is agitated. She wants to be with him already. “Why are you angry?” I ask. Up until now, we’ve been having a good time window shopping and drinking coffee. It is a rainy day outside, and this is the perfect place to loiter. I don’t really expect an answer. I ask because I am surprised by her sudden turn in mood and until that moment we are any mother and daughter enjoy

What a relief to come home to a quiet house. When I got back from visiting my parents, I actually looked forward to doing the laundry, to cooking dinner, to—dare I say it—doing the dishes. It was a nice day, but I worked hard to keep Mom occupied. Let's blame it on the weather. Israel is blanketed in a yellow hazy sandstorm with temperatures in the 90s. And it’s humid. Mom was restless at home, so we decided to walk the 15 minutes to the local mall. Big mistake. By the time w

“Look how blue the sky is!” Mom commented as we sat in the sun drinking our coffee. I’d been prepared to find Mom angry and out of sorts. Daddy had told me that she’d verbally abused him. She doesn’t like it when she’s reminded to do things like brush her teeth or wear pajamas to bed (instead of the clothes she’s worn all day). When you ask why she’s yelling and cursing, she vehemently denies these incidents, these jagged shifts in mood that seem to come and go without warnin

...and a helping of baked salmon. I hadn’t intended to enjoy myself taking Mom to her weekly concert, but the enthusiasm of the tenor (which made up for his lack of talent) and the fantastic piano accompaniment won me over. The concerts are usually on Mondays, but this week’s was postponed to Tuesday due to Holocaust Remembrance Day. Mom loves these “Music at Midday” concerts that are organized by She’arim Netanya. Even though she’s now a non-functioning member, she’s still o

Imagine a world where reality is suspect. Think Soylent Green, Logan’s Run, The Matrix, Ender’s Game. If you’ve seen any of these sci-fi films, you can visualize the protagonist’s fight to overcome the reality espoused by those in power. Each movie ends cathartically with the protagonist winning his battle to reveal the true reality. Now imagine on a smaller scale an individual who battles against disbelief her whole day, an individual who is told by the very people she loves